Sunday, May 10, 2009

Everybody's Turned Bitch

It's a sad day in Black America. Today I just about had it and was about to flat out quit Facebook. It seems like everytime I get a status update from one of my male friends, they are doing the most bitch assed shit in the world. I'm talking about cats that come from some of the roughest circumstances in the roughest hoods going, talking about "Off to get my poodle a trim" or "Picking daisies with my oldest son". This shit is disheartening. I'm not much better. "I'm headed to yoga class" or "I miss my sweetie". That's some old bullshit. My father's got skin made of steel. My mother is notorious for being hardcore. And I'm out here shitting on the family reputation.

We're all victims of our relative success. When you see and experience nice shit, you tend to gravitate to it. So when my boy sends a status update like "I just finished baking popovers", I guess that African just wanted some fucking popovers, as bitch like as that may be. Who am I to judge?

I just can't keep reading this shit. Cats with a real rooting interest in "Sunday's Best", muthafuckers grabbing their snacks gearing up for a new episode of "Grey's Anatomy" or about to settle down with the latest issue of "Cat Fancy". I think I'm legitimately going to opt out and stick to this blog.



Miz JJ said...

Lol. I was thinking of dropping facebook when my mom joined last week.

Knockout Zed said...

That would be the day that I quit. I'm glad my mother is still quite inept when it comes to social networking.


onefromphilly said...


I find it all to be lighthearted silliness.

A.u.n.t. Jackie said...

would you rather their status updates included doing hoodrat shit with their friends?

poetrystruth said...

I know you are just venting. But mayhaps, this is what is wrong with us. We feel like we got to be hard and whatnot to be African. That's why we got these shitty ass rappers making so much $$$ and influencing our young folks.

We don't have to fit into some macho ass box to be who we are...people of African ancestors. Trust and believe no matter what the status updates say, we can still carry the tough shit on our shoulders when we need to, and that is the message we need to send out to our folks.

Knockout Zed said...

My new mantra is "third way". There's got to be a third way to express one's self. "I'm going to the nail place that sells good chicken!" is horrible from my old high school sweetheart. So is "Ow, my uterus hurts" from the neighborhood tough guy.

I'm always for not fitting into these "ethnic" or even gender defined boxes. I just didn't realize that's all some muthafuckers write about. I'm sorry, I don't trust a dude that's a big Tyler Perry fan. I have a problem with a cat that gets tingly inside when Creflo Dollar is on the screen. I don't have a problem with a dude having a tea party with his daughter. Maybe it's just me.


Mr.Slish said...

hahahahah...yeah I'm guilty....Facebook and my newborn son have turned me into a

Knockout Zed said...

No it hasn't. Not at all. There are people that I friended who be sayin' shit like "I'm wearing warm socks, listening to the raindrops hit the window and watching 'Ugly Betty'". Those cats are pussy! I came from a rough area, but I'm not a gangster or a hard guy, so I understand being yourself and not frontin'. But that's some real bitch shit. Not loving your son and your family.


1969 said...

This is pure Zed.....LOL!!!!

Bytchass status updates indeed.

My next one is going to be "Where do I dump the body?"

Blah Blah Blah said...

I am always oping I'll run across one tat is I can take it and make it

FB has fallen off my radar...well actually, I forgot my password. It's locked in on my cell but not on unless it's a direct message to me...I ain't checking for FB.

My status...
"Bloopty is saying, Stop being an Athol!"