Tuesday, June 02, 2009

The Gift That No Longer Gets Shot

I was just thinking about how much my life has changed in a fairly short period of time and it occurred to me: I would much rather eat great food than have great sex.

When the fuck did that happen? When did my fat ass take over from my fat dick? And how can I reverse the change?

Actually, I'm not sure I want to reverse the change. I find myself not seeking out porno when I get home (at least not ALL the time), but I read about hot restaurants, recipes, and cooking techniques that enhance the flavor. I bemoan the fact that my cooking skills suck and that I don't have ready access to Michelin starred greatness. More than anything, I regret that I don't get to eat more good stuff more often. Fuck more often, more like never.

It's the kind of complaint I used to lodge in regards to my sex life. But right now, I don't really give a fuck. I just wanna eat well.

Be cool,
KZ

10 comments:

Kim said...

Wow! You are changing...

Blah Blah Blah said...

Fat ass vs. fat dick....hmmmm
3 weeks of extreme horniness...right now if I could get the latter I would forgo the food.

And did you use...bemoan?

A.u.n.t. Jackie said...

my i introduce you to my new favorite website in the world...Well two of 'em actually

Yelp.com where you can find good restaurants and read user reviews

epicurious.com if you can read and shop you can cook and they have every recipe known to man!

Knockout Zed said...

@Kim
Maybe...maybe not. LOL

@BBB
Hell yeah, bemoan.

@AJ
Hell yeah!!! Good lookin' out. It still won't help me in the Anus, though. This place fucking sucks.

KZ

Little Brown Girl said...

You're married now so isnt this what is supposed to happen? No more sex and no more home cooked meals LMAOOOOOO!!!

Hey Dear!!!

onefromphilly said...

Your more comcerned about your health than your d***. That's not because of marriage, that's because of AGE! LOL

Knockout Zed said...

@RD
Arrrrggghhhh!!!! This is the way it's supposed to be, isn't it? Why didn't y'all warn me!

@OneFrom
Yeah, I'm officially old. I've been unofficially old for a while now.

KZ

Mr.Slish said...

Hahahaha....I was telling someone the other day that I've given up watching porn and jerking off...lol...It was starting to fuck with my sex life...lol...Now All I wanna do is read trashy ghetto street lit and download good music...lol..

1969 said...

Good Food, a quality cup of coffee and either a good book or music coupled with peace and quiet....and I am straight.

Welcome to maturity. LOL

Sooz said...

We call it the food porn phenomenon. The same you used to talk about getting with the opposite sex, you talk about food, meals, the possibility of a great meal, etc. You get all your senses involved, hmmm... It's not that sex isn't important, but you just can't share it with everyone. Now a good piece of chilean sea bass or seared duck with a foie gras balsamic reduction... Damn that Top Chef!!