Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Eukanuba

Today is another one of those days. My boss called in today and decided he'd like to spend this glorious day at home with his wife (who's a teacher and off for the summer) and kids (who are...kids, and off for the summer). That leaves me in charge. What that means is I inherit meetings and shit. Responsibility, I got in scads, but meetings I generally avoid, as you readers already know.

I didn't know he wasn't coming in. I didn't know until I turned on my computer today and read the email from him. Today started off badly anyway. I got here at around 9. Work starts at 8. I woke up at 8:30, so I think that's pretty good to get here and 9 and not smell like ass and feet. The thing is people think they NEED everything from the boss. We have an amazing dearth of self starters here, so when I walk in, it's like "Finally, I can be instructed on if and when to breathe." Gosh, I hate these bastards.

The trivial becomes necessary and the necessary becomes an emergency. The questions become dumber.

Peace,
KZ

P.S. Ladies, don't ask me if I'm getting nervous about getting married. The analogy? Say you're about to fuck a dude for the first time. He's about to penetrate, you look down and realize he has four more inches of dick than you've ever taken in your life. Either you can balk and say "Fuck that, he's not putting that monster in me!" Or you can relish the opportunity as a new experience that you might just enjoy. It's not about nerves, it's about being ready for what life holds for you.

11 comments:

Blah Blah Blah said...

Analogy i sxlife sometimes...and when I saw the extra 4 inches...I got up and put my clothes and left the house.
EFF that!

...budda I get what you are saying.

Knockout Zed said...

@BBB
You are silly as hell!

KZ

The Second Sixty-Eight said...

Hell I wouldn't mind looking down and have that extra four inches. Just to see what kinds of problems and opportunities that creates!

And as usual I am cracking up at those folk at your work place.

Monie said...

Hilarious marriage analogy! LOL!

A.u.n.t. Jackie said...

Well following in your hard working footsteps I am gonna take my vacation summer as back to work!

I gotta make sure I can afford to get to a fall wedding;-)

And about the extra dick. Considering the only man offering me sex wants to do so with the full intent of knocking me up I don't see any need for me to get nervous because I don't plan to see the likes of that dick any time in the near or remote future.

I over commented sorry!

1969 said...

Four more inches is a bad thing?

You can tell I am the type of woman that looks at marriage as a challenge worth tackling. :)

Anonymous said...

Interesting analogy. Never thought about marriage that way.

proacTiff said...

i love the analogy like i love an unexpected 4 inches. this actually has happened to me on past several occasions. fast forward. now i'm being made to pay for past gluttonous behaviors. shortcomings --i liken to your disdain for meetings. thankfully i'm a self starter--and--finisher cause thing keeps coming up short...

Poetry said...

The whole exra 4 inches thing is the reason I never look down. I'm afraid of heights.

Anonymous said...

awwwwwww....that was a halfway mushy analogy. LOL

ChezNiki said...

Just think, soon youll be able to take off and spend a couple days with your wife (and kids).

Four extra inches?!?!?!

Such a problem, I wish I had ((holding forehead, shaking head))