Tuesday, April 07, 2009


I make plans all the time. And we all know the best laid plans of mice and men often go awry. But my plan for 2009 started in July 2008. It's when I decided to make myself more physically fit. I'm not doing it for my general health or anything of real value. I just wanna look good in my clothes. I call my plan "The 40-Year Old Linebacker", though that's really a misnomer, since I won't be 40 until December 2010. My goal is simple, to be in the best shape of my life and punch muthafuckers in the mouth when irritated. I could always punch muthafuckers in their mouths, but now I won't have to run afterwards to keep from getting my ass kicked.

The results so far have been a weight reduction from 330 to 275, increased energy, clothes that don't fit, and confidence that's off the charts. It's a great feeling and I still have quite a ways to go, but it's a start.

Lately though the plans have been getting bogged down. I'm too self-satisfied, too hungry, too bored, too blah. I need motivation. What the fuck am I doing this for? For women? I'm married, and she don't give a fuck. For health? This is a miserable way to live. For vanity? I don't care enough. I'm just losing steam right now. Every thing I do seems for nothing, and I have so far to go to get to 235-240, which is my goal.

I need to come up with a new plan.



Blah Blah Blah said...

I'm too Blah!

As long as your bra size for your man-titties stays below mine...36C...then who cares how much you weigh...lol
However, going to the gym is another reason for you to get out
of the house and not become a hermit. Plus, gym stories are hilarious.

The Brown Blogger said...

Shit Bruh... That is the plan.

Punching muthaphukas in the mouth without running is a great plan.

Oh, and the health bennies is a good thing too.

A.u.n.t. Jackie said...

do it so that your health plan doesn't drop you, cuz that's what happened to one of my co workers who wouldn't lose weight.

do it so that you won't fall prey to hypertension diabetes and heart failure like too many black men and women for that matter.

Do it so when you see your Frats they can all get jealous cuz you lost so much weight and got a fine ass wife!!

Bananas said...

Dude, I go to the gym for one reason and one reason only. Obesity in men can cause erectile dysfunction. God forbid that I was ever with the woman of my dreams and my shit don’t work.

BZ said...

I don't think you necessarily need inspiration. You know why you're going and why you're not going. You need to find a way to keep it interesting. The energy, the visual results, the attention, etc. are all fun and great side-effects. I love sleeping better at night. I love having more energy in the morning. I love new clothes! And part of my motivation is that it's a hell of a lot cheaper (wardrobe wise) being skinny than fat. Little people have it way easier on the wallet.

Maybe get a trainer? I know you don't like people. But, the social support of having a buddy you work out with is great.

www.bodybuilding.com is a great online resource. You can track your workouts, progress, inches, pounds and they put all the sh*t in nifty little graphs. LOL One of my coworkers is doing the P90X and is seeing some serious results in just a couple weeks -- like it promises. No bullsh*t.

My trainer changes it up all the time keeping me challenged. I'm the type of person that welcomes a challenge because I want to blow your expectations out of the water.

I love to cook, so part of what keeps me entertained is finding new ways to make healthy sh*t tasty.

Knockout Zed said...

I REALLY hate people, yo! I've thought about personal trainers, but they're whole EXISTENCE pisses me off. You're not better than me! Eff you!

I can't afford to buy new suits or tailor the ones I have, so I look like I'm wearing my big brother's hand me downs.

I keep hearing about this P90X thing, but is it sustainable? I've plateau'ed since December. It's bad news right now.


poetrystruth said...

Did you know that if you don't lose weight you will more than likely get hypertension and ummm bruh when hypertension pops off, impotence is sure to follow.

Do it for the sex!

If you want to keep it long and strong keep dropping the weight. Congrats on your progress so far.

ChezNiki said...

Arent you 6'3"? You will be way too skinny at 240. Yall are in the mid-west. You need to keep your wife warm at night! Besides, Ive seen you on FB and you are looking berry berry goot!

To end a plateau, I heard tell you have to switch up your routine and fool your body into thinking its doing something new. Change the workout routine, your diet or both. You have more than eighteen months to go, so dont drive yourself crazy, and dont gain any weight. Youll be alright.

Sexy Linebacker! That's Whassup!

Monie said...

Congratulations to you! Losing weight and staying committed is HARD work so I give you much props for this.

Monie said...

OH! And that P90X will have you with 911 on stand by. I highly recommend.

Sheletha said...

You will always have Saturdays