Sucker Time

Hey everybody! What's good? There's nothing going on with me. I got a rejection letter from Baltimore, I'm waiting on what Raleigh has to say, so in the meantime I am where I am. Satan's Anus is horrible still, but at least I don't have to LIVE and work here. One out of two ain't bad.

The interview I had in Raleigh right before Thanksgiving was interesting. Interesting in the fact that the guy I interviewed with reminds me of my current boss (bad) , and one of the people who would possibly be under me tried to compliment me by calling me "articulate". He better hope I don't get the gig. I'm watching his ass already.

Otherwise I'm just trying to cope with Sucker Time and not get suckered too badly by fake deals, mall related scams, thievery, debauchery, and/or general chicanery. We really do spend too much fucking money on worthless shit during this time of year. I genuinely can't remember what I got for Christmas last year, though I'm sure I was pleased with it at the time. That means I likely didn't need it. I'm not 6, it's ok to pass on my gift, I'll survive. I have yet to talk to another person in my family that feels that same. So I'm out here at Sucker Time trying to do my best, just like everyone else.

Peace,
KZ

What A Crazy Year It's Been

This post is a little late because of my lack of internet access at TAD's crib. Oh TAD, am I gonna ever get you to the 21st century? Crazy kid!

Anyway, I've been in Detroit since yesterday and driving back to Satan's Anus was no small task. The roads were extra slippery and I witnessed THIRTEEN accidents. I was shook. This is my first winter with Gretchen, and since I'm used to having the massive SUV, I was slightly intimidated.

Overall, Christmas was good. I got a new briefcase filled with the greatest stuff in the world from TAD. I was pleasantly surprised that she took advantage of that Amazon wishlist, because she got me some obscure beats and books that I'd been wanting forever. Plus a buncha coffee which I'm partaking of as I write.

And TAD? She got engaged...










I engaged the fuck outta her. Trust me when I say I tried, tried like hell to get a decent, unblurry pic of that ring. It refuses to be photographed properly.

That shit happened on Christmas eve.

The next day we went visiting and shit. Family stuff, where TAD and I had to tell everybody "the story", even when we disagreed on what "the story" was. We got two different versions of it, so that'll confuse the kids one day.

We did a lot of fun shit which mainly consisted of visiting friends and family and going to the bookstore a lot.

On New Year's Eve we were going to go to my boy Hutty's crib for his annual soirée, but the weather didn't cooperate, so we stayed home and smooched. And TAD got all domestic and cooked gumbo.
Which I enjoyed (and am still enjoying) immensely.

This year I went from a SUV driving, dreadlocked, bad credit having cynic to a sedan driving, afroed, decent credit who believes the future just might not be so bad. Who'd a thunk it?

Be Cool,
KZ

I Could Really Bank You, Dude

Ah, the holidays. The time when I'm obligated to spend money in celebration of the origin of a religion I'm not a member of, and to do otherwise would open me to allegations of being "cheap". You know what? Fuck December.

I'm going from store to store trying to buy gifts and salespeople are relentless. When I go in a store, I generally know what I want, so I ask for it. I got salespeople who are implicitly questioning my devotion to a loved one if I don't get the "superdeluxeupgrade" edition of whatever they're selling. Muthafucka, you do realize I have to LIVE the other 364 days of the year too, right? Did rent stop being due because it's Christmastime? Do I get a reprieve from the tyranny of the cable company because it's December? These muthafuckas are out of their minds.

Then we got the Christmas Na.zis. You can't write "X-mas" cuz you leavin' the "Christ" outta "Christmas". That's some bullshit. Don't get me on one of my "symbology" rants. I'd like to leave my muthafuckin' money outta Christmas. They want you to say "Merry Christmas" instead of "Happy Holidays", pretty much as a test to make sure that you're a Christian and not a Jew or a Jihadist in disguise. Christians, you fuckin' won. It's your country. We get it. You outnumber everybody else. It's bad e-fuckin'-nuff that I'm going broke for this shit, now I gotta bow down and kiss y'all feet? Fuck y'all in the ass with a day old corn cob.

This time of the year is murder. If I could, I'd fuckin' hibernate through this shit every year.

Merry Xmas, y'all.

KZ