Thursday, October 06, 2005

Education Means Nothing

Hey y'all. I was reading an article the other day about Fantasia from American Idol and her struggle with illiteracy. Actually the struggle is with literacy, 'cuz illiteracy is in charge! Anyway I'm here to tell ol' Boot Mouth, formal education don't mean shit. Ig'nant muthafuckas with degrees proliferate.

I was on a date with E.T. last night. We went to the Olive Garden. Yeah, I know, but this passes for upscale italian food in the boonies. We're sitting down and the waiter comes up and asks for our drink orders. E.T. tells ol' boy she'd like some Pinot Grigio. Sounds cool, right. Hell naw, she pronounces it Pee-NOT Gree-JOE. I start laughing and shit, 'cuz I think she's being funny. She was dead serious, looking at me like "why are you laughing?". So I said, "You must be a connoisseur, hunh?" She was like "Yeah, I always be throwin' wine tastin' parties and stuff."

The rest of the night she was talking about her gig, her friends and family, and her MAN (I'll get to this). Let me tell you all something you might not know about me: I stay on an anti-bullshit crusade. This broad was talking about her "playmama" (WTF? older woman she admires, maybe?) and her "godsisters" (not even close to a church sanctioned designation) and her "playcousins" (friends?). I abhor that shit. It makes you sound like a fucking 10 year old. I would say that this is a major reason I don't regularly date women under 30, but that would lead you to the assumption that women over 30 don't talk about this same dumb shit. This chick has a B.S. in Biology and a M.A. in Education. Them degrees don't buy you shit in the way of actual intelligence or sophistication.

Anyway, she starts talking about her man, this dude she met online from Chicago. She's been kicking it with him for a few months. Actually I would have been upset had I liked her at this point, but I just rolled with the flow. What I take to be the gist of this situation is that the dick is a little too far away and she wouldn't mind if I picked up some of the slack (pun intended, yardies). She didn't put it on the table like that but, shit, she asked me out, I didn't ask her out. She didn't want me to leave that cold ass restaurant (judging by her nipples, it was damn cold!). E.T. extended that date as long as she could. But I jetted as soon as I could.

The bottom line is I think she's a bit of a "gump". I'm not feeling her, but the colder it gets here, the more likely it is that I'll hit. That's the story.

Viva Fantasia,
KZ

8 comments:

Robyn said...

u know...I was going to post on "tasia" too, but I shant (well....if the mood hits me, but pro'lly NOT). But yes, Zed...the boonies have officially gotten to you...fo sho' :-)

Melle Mel said...

You had to pay for dinner and she got a man! This is ridiculous! Damn Zed, don't let those boonie h#e$ play you!

Chubby Chocolate said...

I was going to do a post on play brothers and god sisters...One of my staff once asked me if she could leave early because her play mama invited her over. I told her no, just because she used the term.

You're getting conditioned to settle for ghetto boonie booty...Tread w/ caution!

~ Eclectic Soul ~ said...

LMAOOOOOOOOO... She's a busta and I HATE Olive Garden, *ugh*. Yeah, you need to get back to the City.... *lol*.

brooklyn babe said...

As far as your M.O. goes is that you have NO M.O....lol So it don't matter whether or not UR feeling a chick.... "hit anywayz...." lmao
just be sure to post for us nosies...

toneec42 said...

Umm-mmm-mmm Zed...
Where do you find them? Yeah, ET is a little country (I won't even say ghetto). So you're gonna take up the slack, huh?

twin said...

dog you are my boy. All I can sat us that be careful, too much ass and drama can get a man in more ass and drama

NameLiar said...

Wow play mommas and ish that shit went out in the 80s when I was like 5. I hate when people order shit they can't pronounce What had me rolling was the part when ole' girl says, "Yeah, I always be throwin' wine tastin' parties and stuff." What the fuck does she drink at these parties, ripple?