Sunday, October 02, 2005

When Bad Things Happen To Bad People

Say niggas, what's percolatin'? I'm back from Detroit earlier than I expected, once again. It's always something in that muthafucka that I idealize when I'm away and then when I'm back I'm like "Now I remember why I fuckin' left". I got there Friday night and my fuckin' nerves were on edge. Everything seemed busier and faster than I was used to. It was very chaotic. I had a bad feeling almost from jump. I was born and reared in that city, I had never been like that before. I felt I was getting too used to this pastoral setting out in the boonies. I told myself to toughen up and shake it off.

I went to see the Dreadlady. As usual, she was looking good, wearing tight shit. I relaxed and sat back, watching a rerun of the BET Comedy Awards. I really fucking hate awards shows. I hardly ever watch them and I was reminded why on Friday. They are a cultural barometer. Our "culture" is base and anti-intellectual. But that's the subject for another blog. Dreadlady's ass was bangin'.

She stood on the side of me. I grabbed the ass with one hand. "You been workin' out?" I asked. She gently brushed my hand away. "Why you playin'. You know you wanna fuck me." "And all you wanna do is fuck" she rightfully replied. I continued to try to paw her as she was working on my hair. It was around 11:00 pm when she finished. Dreadlady was about to go clubbing with some friends of hers so went upstairs to get ready. I told her I'd wait to walk out with her. When she came down she was looking fantastic. I started hugging her and kissing on her neck. She began to grind against me. My dick was getting harder. She sat down and moved her dress around her waist. I started playing with the pussy, kissing her and shit. She asks me to pull out my dick and I oblige. She's stroking it and telling me she's GOT to sit on it. Right then, her girl pulls up in the driveway and blows her horn, all ghetto fantastic and shit. She gets up to leave and says to me "I wanna see you when I leave the club." I'm like cool, call me. And I jet over to KeKe's crib, 'cuz she let me crash while she was out kickin' it. KeKe is the shit!

So that night at around 3:00 am while I'm sleeping on KeKe's couch and the phone is ringing. It's Dreadlady. I look at the phone and lay back down.

The next morning when KeKe got back we kicked it a little bit and I left to pick up my boy Three so we could go to the Black Alumni tailgating function. I grabbed my stuff and left, just in case I ended up in a different place to crash Saturday night. Me and Three got there and it was a cornucopia of bitches and whatnot in the place. I was in my element. Loving it. I got to see a bunch of my people including Twin and in general had a good time. I even finished up some unfinished business with a woman I'll call "The Lean". It was productive as fuck.

When me and Three left the spot I was feeling as good as I'd felt in a long time even thought the wrong team won. I got to my car and had a sick ass feeling. Bluey was sitting there with the driver's side window bashed in. All my shit was gone, cell phone, digital camera, overnight bag, briefcase, gone. All I could do is shake my head. It's broad fucking daylight on a busy street and just like that my wealth was redistributed.

I went to file a police report with the slow assed,non-essential Detroit Police Department, dropped Three off, and left town. Wind in my fucking face, back to safe, sound Satan's Anus. Happily.

Will Someone Please Steal This Car?
KZ

7 comments:

Didi Roby said...

WTF? is up with these 2 posts right here?:)

Hey baby...hope your weekend was good:)

Some unfinished business huh?

You dreadlady are a mess:)

toneec42 said...

While your disrespect for women is starting to slap me in the face I am sorry to hear about the redistribution of your wealth. Perhaps you didn't make a bad move to the boonies after all.

Disco said...

lawd,lawd, lawd....so you rode BACK to the Anus of Lucifer and had bugs, flies and all kinda shit on ya face when you arrived. Lawd. I was wondering why I didn't hear from your monkey! you know why they stole it though right? It LOOKED like it was easy to break into!!! I mean...what they gon do with yo funky draws...???

twin said...

dog it was good seeing you and where did you park at? Also did you talk to the girl of your dreams before you went back to the farm :(

Knockout Zed said...

@dee-dee
That unfinished business was not sinister. I just exchanged contact info with a woman I've been digging since my last year in college (1994)!

@keke
You looked out tremendously. I owe you big (not THAT big).

@tonee tha diva
I'm not attempting to show contempt for women. I'm just giving an UNFILTERED look at what goes on in my life and what I'm thinking at those times. Stay with me, tonee. It'll get better.

@robyn
I was like Ace Ventura and shit. Driving with my head out the broken window. It's fucking cold on the freeway.

@twin
I parked behind Floods by the BCBS parking structure (Congress and St. Antoine). I did get to talk to the girl of my dreams. That girl was "The Lean" I spoke of in the blog. I'll be hooking up with her soon.

KZ

twin said...

that is all i needed to know it was live on saturday

Chubby Chocolate said...

Sorry to hear about that Zed...ROBYN-You are too funny!