Happy New Year, y'all. I hope you've started this year off right. I don't think I have. I'm still bitter and pissed. I gotta a lot of shit on my mind, like my brain is swelling. I am ultimately unfulfilled, but my job is fairly straight forward so I'm not that ready to go. I'm filled with anxiety about not leaving a big enough mark on society. In my mind, I'm unstoppable. In reality, I just don't try.
My neighbor, Luther, stopped me yesterday as I was going into my unit. I'm overloaded with bags and he had to talk. I've never been so close to yelling at anybody "Leave me the fuck alone!" in my life. He says to me, "I know I'm buggin' you, but I'm lonely out here." I was torn between sympathy and disgust. I understand, but I'm not here to solve his shit. He's irritating and I'm not trying to make a friend by default.
My neighbor, Luther, stopped me yesterday as I was going into my unit. I'm overloaded with bags and he had to talk. I've never been so close to yelling at anybody "Leave me the fuck alone!" in my life. He says to me, "I know I'm buggin' you, but I'm lonely out here." I was torn between sympathy and disgust. I understand, but I'm not here to solve his shit. He's irritating and I'm not trying to make a friend by default.
This blog and my locs. I keep trying to part ways with both of 'em and I can't seem to pull the trigger.
This is the other shit on my mind, in no particular order:
This is the other shit on my mind, in no particular order:
Satan's Anus
I will not settle for less 'cuz I'm here. I know the nature of small town shit and how one can get caught up in minutia. I will not be drawn down into the low level nature of thinking. I must do better. I think I may have lost the ability to think big.
Detroit
Old friend, it's been real, but I can't fuck wit' you much more.
Rubik's Pussy
Why oh why do I get the ass delivered on a platter when I don't want it? And why can't I get what I really want? It's a puzzle I can't solve.
36
What lessons was I supposed to have learned by now? What mistakes should I not be making? Where am I supposed to be going? I feel like this shit should be better defined by now.
Bugaboo, my four year old nephew
You little bad ass muthafucka. When you get older, Imma take you outside and challenge you to fistfight. "You're a fat giant!" Imma put a fat giant foot up your ass!
I will not settle for less 'cuz I'm here. I know the nature of small town shit and how one can get caught up in minutia. I will not be drawn down into the low level nature of thinking. I must do better. I think I may have lost the ability to think big.
Detroit
Old friend, it's been real, but I can't fuck wit' you much more.
Rubik's Pussy
Why oh why do I get the ass delivered on a platter when I don't want it? And why can't I get what I really want? It's a puzzle I can't solve.
36
What lessons was I supposed to have learned by now? What mistakes should I not be making? Where am I supposed to be going? I feel like this shit should be better defined by now.
Bugaboo, my four year old nephew
You little bad ass muthafucka. When you get older, Imma take you outside and challenge you to fistfight. "You're a fat giant!" Imma put a fat giant foot up your ass!
Maia Campbell
Why the crack, sweetie? What a beautiful mess.
Peace,
KZ
18 comments:
Maia Campbell...I saw that video the other day. Very sad. Her mom was noted author Bebe Moore Campbell who recently passed. **sigh** we have to do better as a people ya'll.
Zed....only you control your destiny. You know this. Refocus in 2007, okay? Cute the locs, beat your nephew and move.
on maia campbell: this just shows you that having "it all" still doesn't solve a damn thing. she is a beautiful woman who is deeply troubled. who knows why is she what she is now. we can all be her.
as for the other shit, do what makes you happy man! regardless of what you do, folk won't ever be satisfied. you have to satisfy yourself.
Is Luther gay?
Oh, and who the hell is Maia Campbell?
*huggs* and Happy New Year! Sorry we missed each other in FL. But, we will make it happen.
@69
*sigh* Maia.
My nephew is gone get it. August 28, 2019. Imma whup his ass.
@Aqua
I'll be satisfied once I solve this Rubik's Pussy.
@Stilts
Maia Campbell is the chick from that LL Cool J show "In The House". She's Bebe Moore Campbell's daughter (as noted by the illustrious Sixy)
See, if I said that shit about Luther, I'd be getting emails about my homophobia. I just let that shit lie.
@BZ
That was all fucked up! We damn near got wiped out by tornados and shit!
We gotta make it happen next time we get the opportunity.
KZ
Of course Luther was gay. It's just one of those known things no one ever talks about.
Maia's acting like I do on a typical Saturday night...that's how I act WITHOUT crack.
The answer are in the matrix..take the blue pill..lol
so does this mean you did or didn't get the midget strip-o-gram i sent you with the girls with the big old booties and marginal pole moves.
Happy New Year!
Maia, Maia, Maia...loved her mothers work, but dang, I hope baby girl gets it together. So Sad.
1969 said it best, refocus...I know I need to, also. Things will become more clear on what to do and when to do them...just refocus. Now, can you send me this same inspiration..LOL...cause I never take my own advice. LMAO
Happy New Year Zeddy -poo!
I have been slackin' on my commenting...
although I lurk like a mutha'!
You should cut your locks and move to CALI!!
I saw the Maia video... sad.
Maybe she just misses her mom.
Maia: Were Those real?
Remember her mom wrote a book about manic depression...
Your hair: Whats holdin you back? How's the shape of your head?
The Anus: Stay. Stash. Travel. Make your mark at work. WRITE!
Her: Get her!
Fuck man, you know the answers.
Quit playin'
Act with confidence and truth.
@L and TV
Ummm...ok. Different Luther, but still, keep me out of it!
Maia. *sigh*
@Slish
If I take the blue pill, I'll never leave the house.
@Miss Ahmad
Those pole moves weren't marginal, believe me. Midgets rock!
@Syn
We all need to step into this thing together. It's a new year. Let's do this!
*crickets*
@SanginDiva
If I move to Cali, I gotta crash on the couch for a few years, OK?
Maia had drug issues long before her mother passed. Nobody put it on YouTube before.
@SoWise
Maia got a jones.
My head is magnificently shaped. It's just big. It's really symbolic. If I cut my hair, it's the end of my youth. Period. I'd unlikely at age 36 start over again.
I gotta write. I'm doing so horribly. But you already know that.
She don't wanna get got yet. I'm waiting.
@Hassan
I gotta speculate and commisserate. The answers ain't comin' easy.
@Butta
Damn, that was concise and to the point. I like it.
KZ
Maia is self destructing...even b4 her Moms died she was doing all kinds of crazy shyt, she talked about her drug addictions, sex addictions, and her being bi-polar doesn't hel (cause I swear BeBe's last book was about her). She's a loose cannon and I honestly don't think she'll survive without her Moms support...but I'ma pray for her and YOU ZEDDIE cause it sounds like your still in a rut and I was hoping for more for you going into 07. Keep ur head up Papi!
Nicely shaped head...ok so you're not completely fcuked then. Never mind the back and forth about it. The choice will make itself once you hit your stride and find that next level. Keep your hair and "youth" for now. ;)
Don't do that to the D.
I already told you what to do about your nephew...beat that butt! Don't you wait one more year...beat him.
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