I've been working my little Quality quest for a few days now, still discovering what works for me. It's all fucked up, 'cuz I'm an emotional wreck. Sitting around appreciating shit you've hardly ever paid attention to is hard work, trust me. Everything's being evaluated: friendships, political views, cuts of meat, internet speed, the whole shot.
This weekend I got inundated with phone calls. It's always the way. When people sense you don't give a fuck, they'll call you to make sure they're right. On Friday, Endo had come to my office to visit her Auntie Anita and she saw me walk past. "Zed!" I turn around. "Hey Endo, what's goin' on?" "Nothing. Where have you been?" That was some priceless shit. Where have I been? You flaky little bitch! "I been workin'. Keepin' this place movin'. I'll see you around." And that was that, so I thought. That was the beginning of a weekend phone call onslaught that saw multiple calls from her, Carmel, Puddin', Thelma, and this chick from Mon.tgom.ery, AL who's fond of sending me pics of her titties on my cell.
Surviving that bullshit, I finally got to do some shit I'd been planning to do for at least 20 years. I took my first guitar lesson yesterday. Damn I suck! I got to get some coordination when trying to learn how to play this thing the "right handed" way. It doesn't seem natural to me. As soon as I learn how to play "Computer Blue", I'm quittin' the class. I think I can play "Fast Car" right now. I'll be the male Tracy Chapman, the only difference being a slightly bigger dick and the ownership of lip balm.
Today, I'll be writing some more. I'm here. Might as well.
Stay Cool,
KZ
This weekend I got inundated with phone calls. It's always the way. When people sense you don't give a fuck, they'll call you to make sure they're right. On Friday, Endo had come to my office to visit her Auntie Anita and she saw me walk past. "Zed!" I turn around. "Hey Endo, what's goin' on?" "Nothing. Where have you been?" That was some priceless shit. Where have I been? You flaky little bitch! "I been workin'. Keepin' this place movin'. I'll see you around." And that was that, so I thought. That was the beginning of a weekend phone call onslaught that saw multiple calls from her, Carmel, Puddin', Thelma, and this chick from Mon.tgom.ery, AL who's fond of sending me pics of her titties on my cell.
Surviving that bullshit, I finally got to do some shit I'd been planning to do for at least 20 years. I took my first guitar lesson yesterday. Damn I suck! I got to get some coordination when trying to learn how to play this thing the "right handed" way. It doesn't seem natural to me. As soon as I learn how to play "Computer Blue", I'm quittin' the class. I think I can play "Fast Car" right now. I'll be the male Tracy Chapman, the only difference being a slightly bigger dick and the ownership of lip balm.
Today, I'll be writing some more. I'm here. Might as well.
Stay Cool,
KZ
11 comments:
Zed, you crack me up. That's why I have to check in with you early in the morning to get my chuckle on! Male Tracy Chapman...LOL!
It's the beginning of a new year so expect to keep getting those calls from marginal people (as Ms Ahmad has named them).
Compared to me you could be BB King. I've been trying to master ASL (american sign language)for a few years now. And I really suck. My son is taking this as his high school foreign language requirement, so you would think I had learned something from him. WRONG! I was trying to communicate with a deaf person on Sunday, you should have seen the look of bewilderment on his face. After a few minutes he handed me a piece of paper and a pencil!! OMG LMAO
Why right handed? Hendrix played left handed and no one complained. Is it the rule for marginal people to verify that you don't give a fuck? I mean, if I get that sense I just go with that.
FOR YOU: Good Motto to live by Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, champagne in one hand - strawberries in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming WOO HOO - What a ride!!!!!
You've been so sad lately, do the damn thing Zed!!!
You get pics of tits, I get pics of hard ons...will open my phone like WTH? Needless to say, that person doesn't talk to me anymore as of last week, I'm sure someone will pick up his slack on the pics. LOL
My 8 year old is a left handed percussionist and all percussion music is written for right handed people. He plays in a ensemble so he has to make sure he watches his sticking to be uniformed. So, yeah, we know all about that.
One more thing, go head and make it happen, Zed...nuff said.
LMAO! @ "bigger dick and the ownership of lip balm"
PRICELESS! But, that's always the way!
Congratulations on starting the guitar lessons...I took guitar lessons once, I couldnt do it with my left OR right hand. Ill stick to singing!
I thought that ignore-them-and-theyll-come-running-to-you stuff only worked on men...interesting...
Happy '07 Zeddie!!!
congrats on the first guitar lesson! i have a guitar too--only, mine is more for "aesthetic" reasons. simply put, dudes seem to think it's sexy that i have a guitar posted in my apartment...? i can't wait til my djembe gets here!!!!
Happy New Year Zed! Still laughing 'bout the 'cuts of meat'.
@OneFrom
LMMFAO! Damn, he handed you a paper and pencil?
These mugs are peeking in my office to see what I'm laughing at.
@Chele
Ol' dude was talking about the hassle of reversing the strings. Plus, he claims if you start off right handed, you'll be fine. He's an ass.
People need to be told "fuck off" every now and then.
@OSB
PHOTO ALERT!!! What's happenin', young lovely?
I have been pretty sad. Some ol' unrequited shit. That's what's up.
@Syn
I'm not mad at the pics, just not very interested right now.
He's left handed so you know he's a winner, right off the bat!
@BZ
Why don't the "candidates" call like you want 'em to? Only the also-rans.
*sigh*
@Cheznikivox
You're really gonna make me sign up and have a new account to comment on your page, aren't you?
If I could sing, I'd buy a pussy wagon, to collect all the boots Imma be knockin'.
@Supa
Happy '07 to yo' book-writin' ass! Yeah, I'm jealous.
@FA
Isn't it funny how people get intrigued when they see the guitar? My frat brothers came through for a committee meeting, and each one of them as they came through made comments about the guitar. Now if I could just get a chick to come through and be intrigued by it.
@Paula
How did you enjoy the tornado for the holidays?
KZ
Guitar lessons! Way cool....
I have salsa lessons, hand dance lessons, and my remedial spanish lessons on tap for the 101/1001 but I haven't anything "new"....
Ideas for the next list :)
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