Sunday, February 05, 2006

The Season For Giving

Hey, y'all! I got an odd request in the mail this weekend. It was a request for monetary assistance from a friend of a friend. She's buying a house and she came up around $2,000 short. So she's asking people that she knows to pitch in and help her out. I guess all in all it's not an odd request, it's just I don't know her all that well.

She called me at work on Friday. I had no idea she had my work number. I can't remember giving it to her. But I hadn't heard from her in the seven months since I left the City. Not a word beyond the occasional, dumb ass forwarded e-mail. She asked me for my address. I asked her "Aw, what's up? You gettin' hitched?" She said "Somethin' like that." So I gave her my address.

I can imagine it's sort of hard to hit someone up on the phone for a loan (or a gift), but it was strange that she could call me for the address and not tell me a little of her plight. But like I said, she's a friend of a friend.

So I got this mail from her and I thought it would be an invite to a wedding or something and it was this "gift" request. I honestly don't know how to proceed. Should I give? If I give, what wouldn't make my ass look cheap? I mean, I don't know her like that.

Here's where you (yes, you!) come in. Usually I read the comments and blow off every piece of advice I don't like, but I'll really take yours into consideration this time. I promise. I don't have a clue how to proceed. I'm looking forward to your input.

Regards,
KZ

19 comments:

Insaneblackwoman said...

Hey, Brother. Whats up? Here's my take on your plight:

I find it highly presumptuous on this lady's part that she should feel comfortable with asking you for a monetary donation towards her homebuilding endeavor, when you two really aren't so acquainted with one another. I would call the mutual friend that she and I have in common and let that friend know that I received a letter from "our" friend asking for money. And then too, she could be lying about why she needs the money. I wouldn't donate any money; I would however, offer to send her a nice, appropriate housewarming gift to her once she gets the paperwork cleared up and is moved into her new house. I mean, I'm pretty generous with my money, but I only lend to people I am truly familiar with and know that they can repay said loan. And chances are, this woman has a man; hell, let him give up the $2,000. He's the one whos gonna be sleeping with her... Or you could just tell her the truth that you don't feel comfortable giving her money since you don't really know her, or that you really don't have it to spare. She'll understand - HOPEFULLY. But then again, people do get snippity when you don't give they ass something. And if you don't give her any money, I bet you'll never hear from her again. Either way, keep your money in your pocket, Zeddy. Now if she had asked to "borrow" the money, then you make sure you get a receipt and promissory note from her, okay? Just make sure you make the decision that you believe is right for you. Aint no way in hell I'd be soliciting money from somebody I barely know.

Chubby Chocolate said...

Two things:

She's not a close friend = Don't give her the money.

If the tables were turned, would she (remember she's a friend of a friend) give you money?

Follow IBWs advice and get her homewarming gift, but ONLY after she sends you an invitation to a housewarming party.

Honest said...

My 2 cents:

1) Can you afford to give her anything? Do you want to give her anything?

What would I do? I wouldn't give her a dime but I'd show up at her housewarming with a big bottle of Grey Gouse and some tonic.

Anonymous said...

It's so easy to ask for a handout - she needs to get a little more creative.

Knockout Zed said...

OK, OK, I can't take it anymore. The guilt is too much. In the spirit of full disclosure, I must add one piece of information. I may have, on one occassion, while intoxicated, placed my penis in her vagina, repeatedly until mutual orgasms were reached. This only happened once. Does this change your opinion?

KZ

nikki said...

my opinion before the disclosure about the sex:

only forward money if you're really aiight with it, cuz if not, you'll grow to resent the gesture.

my opinion after the disclosure about the sex:

same thing.

if you know her either personally or through a friend, then you know if she's responsible enough to put the money to its intended use. folk need help every now and again. sometimes they ask for more than what we can give. however, if we can give it and the only thing standing in our way of being generous is the fact that they're not related to us, what does that say about us?

but again, it all comes down to how YOU feel about giving her money. if it has to be done begrudgedly, don't do it at all.

Anonymous said...

SO...in a sense...she's asking you to pay up since she fucked... and in a sense...your debating if the ass was good enough for you to feel obligated to "pay for it"....You are too much Zed...

...but while your making out that check...deposit some of that in my acount and I'll have to owe you the pussy at a later date LOL
.....Washington Mutual account # 1884XXXXXX

LMAO

Insaneblackwoman said...

Seeing as how you done disclosed the fact that you done fucked her once or twice, you gone have to give up the money now, Zed. I mean, come on... I give up the pussy to some negro, he gone have to pay me. Either now or at some later date. LOL. But like someone else said, was the pooty tang worth the amount you debating on sending her? Please... I'd tell homegirl to get lost. LOL. She should have asked for the money at the time you did the "do" with her. It's kinda too late to be calling in favors now.

brooklyn babe said...

Oh you're a sucka... send her sumptin.... how dare you mislead us, probably mislead her too...
if you got it to give, then GIVE IT. You probably owe her anywayz, especially if you were a bad lay... just j/k.... lol

Superstar Nic said...

ZED, I LMAO!!!! Why didn't you reveal this little bout of intimacy before!!!!

I was already leaning towards giving her "something" if you could afford it, but now I say "hell yeah" you should help her out. I'm not saying break the bank, but every little bit counts.

Many of us would make a donation to a total stranger. Why not help out some one that you know?

The_Practitioner said...

Fuck that. That's bold! Some people stretch the very boundaries of their associations with people.

Unless you and I have actually gone together - I don't give brawds money. Not even if they've swallowed. ;o)

Anonymous said...

Okay!!! I do not care that you sleeped with the chick. No do not give her shit... If you do not feel like it. Just because you fucked do not mean you owe her a dime. If you feel $100.00 is good enough to donate to her moving into a house fund then give her that. But as I recall reading your past blogs you do not have furniture and your truck always needs some type of repair. So who is going to help you when you come up short??? If you still do not have your place furnished. Take the 2 grand and buy some. Forget her.... She needs a man not a fly by night friend.... Peace

Chubby Chocolate said...

Just checking in to see your decision, then I come across your comment...I KNEW IT!! You boinked (During my unwanted hiatus from sex, I'm using my extra energy to find creative words for the act)her!!
I can't even make any other comments because I'm laughing so hard....Your comment was hilarious!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Oh Zed...you crass, stingy, yet delightful and hilarious mutha fucka! How I love thee.....

uhhhh, don't give her shit.

Anonymous said...

Who don't you "boink"?

Knockout Zed said...

@All y'all
Everybody here has a valid point. Especially "Anonymous", you crazy low-key kid. I'm going out of town this weekend. I have a predetermined amount I'm willing to spend. If I come in under that, I'll give her the remainder (if it's not TOO much). Otherwise, I'll be good not giving her anything.

KZ

Anonymous said...

If you have to ask, you already know the answer.


LOL at your response, "OK, OK, I can't take it anymore. The guilt is too much. In the spirit of full disclosure, I must add one piece of information. I may have, on one occassion, while intoxicated, placed my penis in her vagina, repeatedly until mutual orgasms were reached. This only happened once. Does this change your opinion?"

Butterfly Jones said...

I can not believe this discussion. Does this woman not have any pride? That is a definite 'hell to the NAW!'. Fuck that b*tch. Oh shit, you already did. LOL!

~ Eclectic Soul ~ said...

LMMFAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!