Monday, April 02, 2007

I went to the Vice Mayor's birthday party on Friday. There were a lot of familiar faces and a lot of people I didn't know. My group of Transplants and a bunch of Dubs. It was a weird mix because basically we stuck to our own, each group. But it's always the busy social atmosphere that I can't take too much of.

So roughly the Black people were in one room talking shit, White people in another and we all came together in the kitchen. I didn't matter which group I was in the midst of, I just wanted to go home. I didn't want anybody trying to crack this carefully constructed shell. Stay out, don't try to pick my brain. You don't need to know what I do for a living and how I think about anything. We ain't cool, we won't ever be cool. This one cat was asking me if I would be interested in supporting his Black history line of t-shirts. Sure, I'd buy one, if it looks good. But this cat is looking for a business partner. I did that Black Pride t-shirt thing before I hit 24. No thank you. Now, put your hand back in your pocket.

One dude owned some rental property in the city and wondered if I'd be interested in living closer to downtown. Now I can't even stay out of everybody's way, off to the side, without being hectored to "just look" at some dude's rental property? Muthafuckas wonder why I stay at home or just out away from them for long stretches of time. My best friends in the world don't understand this, so why should strangers?

I really gotta like you to wanna spend time with you. And it's a crapshoot to whether or not I like you. There is no empirical formula. I got a friend who I used to work with who basically didn't take "Get the fuck away from me" for an answer. Now he's one of my people, but he forced himself in. I think that's the route Luther was/is trying to take.

I tried to be as inconspicuous as a 6'3" man with dredlocs can be in a small town party setting. I was in a corner eating fresh strawberries when I looked up and saw three women staring at me eat. I went outside to get some fresh air and this chick came out to discuss her fascination with R. Kelly.

I wanted to jet a few times during the evening, but the Transplants kept me there. I had to give one of them a ride home because she was toasted and she wanted to stay even longer. This socializing shit was hell on my ISTP.



Little Brown Girl said...

I AM FIRST!!! Zeddie you so friggin ANTI-SOCIAL!!! Unfortunately I dont blame you. I don't do parties anymore unless its one I really want to go to because it is for someone I really care for. Other then that...NOPE I aint gone be able to do it.

Why didn't you have your sweetie come up and attend with you. That always makes the difference for me (if a man I am feeling or remotely interested in is there to hold my attention).

It's Springtime Zeddie Bear...possibilities are in bloom (be open to them, YOU HEAR ME???)

Anonymous said...

I understand why people network ... but personally, I hate it. It all seems so insincere and a waste of time. I wouldn't have lasted an hour at that party.

BZ said...

You're a bigger person than I for sticking it out like that. Is there any way you could benefit from such gatherings? Maybe look at it as a way to exploit others, rather than the ways they try to exploit you. :-)

Angie said...

I'm the only niggra in my department at work, and in most of my classes at school. The parties with my co-workers make me want to stab myself in the eyeballs. I want to go to a party where the electric slide is being done ever 30 minutes!

Knockout Zed said...

She's gotta come here more often. That's established. But she was just here last weekend when we went to Chicago (yeah, I know I didn't write that). I don't wanna keep draggin' her to purgatory when even I don't enjoy it here.

I'll try to be more open to the good stuff.

I almost didn't last an hour. You know, when I was trying to fuck everything in sight, the parties at least held my interest in that respect. Now? I just wanna go home.

The only benefit is me getting the benefit of the doubt from politicians when my issues come to the fore. That's it.

I gotta think more like you. That's hot!

Hell yeah! There's always this fake assed dialogue going on where you're trying to decipher what question you're really being asked. I hate that shit.

Give me the cheap liquor/line dancing shit any day of the week.


A.u.n.t. Jackie said...

we use the meyers briggs test on reality tv contestants....

have you been secretly auditioning for american idol? you can tell me!

Knockout Zed said...

@Miss Ahmad
You know I got them skills.


Miz JJ said...

I enjoy lying and making up stories at events like that. That way when people gossip about you they all have different stories that do not match up. Provides me with lots of entertainment later on.

1969 said...

I hate networking events too. And if the food is bad...fuhgettaboudit!

I don't blame you for wanting to leave...AFRICAN T-SHIRTS! How 1987?

Knockout Zed said...

@Miz JJ
It would have been too much effort to make shit up. As my boy Three and my girl TAD will tell you, I'm a horrible liar. It's written all over my face.

See what I'm sayin'? Why? Why would I wanna invest in that?


Shai said...

I scored as a ISFP. It is a lil off.

I feel ya on spending time with people. I understand completely and some folks find it strange. I can be a social butterfly when I want to, I just prefer solitude more.

onefromphilly said...

Did they have lots of alcohol? I can last longer at these functions if there is lots of alcohol. I'll have one or two drinks, then watch out for the person who will get drunk and provide the drama!! Now that I could stand for a few hours.

Knockout Zed said...

To be social, I really have to act. I almost have to be another person to do it. It's tough, but I muddle through.

Oh, there was plenty of alcohol, just not enough to make me wanna talk to those people all night. I hate small talk, and if I was able to talk about shit I care about, I'm likely to clear out a room.


Nika Laqui said...

heeeeeeeeyyyyyy ZED!!!!!!!!!

Beana said...

I can totally understand being anti-social cause I am too.

It woulda been difficult to even get me to go.

Networking is UGH!!!

Mr.Slish said...

You know what I would have done for fun! Stuff napkins and snacks in everyones coat

Knockout Zed said...

Dang, where have you been? I miss you!

I wish I was an anonymous figure at a bar.

I shoulda! That shit woulda got me through the night unscathed.


aquababie said...

that's why i only go to parties where i like folk. if i gotta be drunk sometimes to interact, i don't wanna go. how long did yo uactually stay?

i had a party this housewarming :) just enough folk to get loose...along with plenty to eat and to drink.