She's beautiful, and when I touch her it's magic. "I got you baby." I hear her whisper that, and I believe her. I've never had a female hold me down like this. It's so new, so fun.
I kissed her for the first time last night. We were driving from the park we spent Sunday at and I leaned over and kissed her. Her response was amazing. She had my head racing, spinning.
Gretchen has an amazing body. When my boy Curly first saw her, he wanted to know if she had a sister. Yeah, she got a sister, but I got the best one, I'm sure. She smells fantastic, all the time.
When I hold her, I feel like there is no place in the world I'd rather be. I love it when I'm inside her. My problems just melt away. I never wanna get out.
I fuckin' love my car. Gretchen, aka Bluey Twoey, is that deal.
Did I mention her fantastic headlights and that junk in her trunk?
The N*ggaview (c)
I had a phone interview this morning with Queen Anne's County, Maryland. It was scheduled at 10:00 am. The County Administrator called me at 10:14. What part of the game is that? Further, the interview concluded at 10:25 when he told me he didn't think I'd be the right fit for the position.
Why would he interview me for a position that he should have known right off that I wouldn't be a good fit for? Because, it was a n*ggaview (c), it wasn't an interview at all.
He was likely completing a checklist that required him to consider minority candidates. He had a panel interviewing the other candidates and he interviewed me himself, alone. He told me so himself. The panel ran over discussing the other candidate, that's why he was late calling me. What type of shit is that? That my friends, was a classic n*ggaview (c). I hope it doesn't happen to you.
Peace,
KZ
22 comments:
Awww...you and Gretchen are so cute together! Here's to many good years together.
As for niggaview....good word. I may have to use it. I'll remember to site you as the source.
@Sixy
She's a firecracker. That girl's amazing. TAD gotta watch her back.
I just want credit for the word, that's why I (c)'ed up. Just give me a little dap.
KZ
Wow, I think I've actually had a n*ggaview before..LOL
I just didn't know it had a proper title... LMAO
Glad you and Gretchen have found love! I know that it usually only strikes men, and I usually don't share this..but I actually love my Escalade. It represents my various personalities. Because it's big, I can bully other drivers on the road, that's my agressive hoodlum side. And because it's a Cadillac, I think I'm better than other people, that's my snobby side. hahahahahahahahahaha
*i crack myself up*
@OneFrom
N*ggaview was an epiphany. It hit me right after I got off the phone with ol' boy.
The one think I miss about not having an SUV is the ability to intimidate other drivers. That's gone. And I definitely won't be able to be like I'm better than them, cuz it's only a Nissan (don't tell Gretchen I said she's "only" anything!!!). But still I'm enjoying myself.
KZ
let me say that you have a come a long way from saying no way would you get a new car to considering it to actually making the deal..
now...Ghost Ride the Whip!
that niggaview is some BOOSHEET. nice word no doubt. i'll give you credit for it.
meanwhile, i was all happy cuz i thought you had a true to life girlfriend. you're breaking my heart zed...BREAKING MY HEART.
I knew u was talkin bout that car when I first starting reading. That new car feeling is great. I went through it in August. I think I'll name my car right now...I'll call him Caspie.
Oh and zed, yes indeed you can intimidate drivers in only a nissan. I do it in only a
kia :-) Its all in how you do it.
Gretchen????
I was getting all moist...the realized your girl have four doors instead of three holes. I am a sucka!
There is nothing like that new car smell! Everything seems better in a new car. You want to drive all day. I have to think way way back to remember the new car smell. My car smells like feet and cookies.
Sorry about you N-view. You should have known something was amiss when the call was 15 minutes late. Damn it white people!
@Miss Ahmad
Ghost ride, indeed. East Oakland, what hath thou wrought?
@Nikki
I've gotten n*ggaviewed before. Lots of times. I just never had a name for it.
Girlfriend? Me? Nah!
@J
A truck bitched me this morning. I was so shook at the thought of Gretchen catching a bad one, I backed off.
Is your car white?
@DL
Yeah, Gretchen. She's fuckin' hot!
@Angie
LOL!!! Feet and cookies. Well, I wouldn't mind the cookie smell.
Yeah, I figured the late call was a bad sign. Dubs aren't traditionally late for something like that.
KZ
On a serious note, are you really not a match for the position?
Aren't there serious legal issues with this type of treatment? It's a public entity, not private enterprise....
yeah my car is white...how did you know LOL
@Baybook
I'm seriously not a good match. It's a public entity. The job was for a development expert and they want someone who'll slow down and stiflie development. I don't know how the fuck to do that. Why do you need a person to do that job? Just make yourself development unfriendly, a difficult bureaucracy. The rest takes care of itself.
@J
Good ol' Caspie. LOL
KZ
How did you end up picking the name of Gretchen? Bluey Twoey just wasn't enough?
@Nexgrl
The car is reminscent of a Audi to me. I just picked a Germanic sounding name and it stuck. She's Gretchen.
KZ
Please tell me Gretchen has navigation...lol
@Slish
Nope, no navi. I woulda had to wait for navi. In the meantime, my truck would've disintegrated.
KZ
That N*ggaview sh*t gives me a pain in my head, but good thing you found out about those jokers BEFORE you relocated and moved with Gretchen :-P
When you go for an interview, you are also interviewing the employers.
What a great word!!! I won't say it. But, that was fantastic. Sorry it happened to you, though. But, hopefully, the thoughts of you and Gretchen spending many years together will help console you.
awwwwwwwwwww man it would of been cool to have you in MD though.
your feelings about your ride...I can soooooooo relate. I still look a Indie and sigh with pride. She's my little girl and I sho do love her LOL!!
Gonna have to use that one, Zed. better yet, hopefully I won't even have to.
Congrats on ya new girl. Sounds like she's a beauty!
Man, I'm just a lurker, but I was all set to be happy for your newly-consummated [human] love thang, too. Oh well. Nice work on the ride. I'm still riding around in a car that ages me 20 years and makes me question my sexuality, but hey...
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