Wednesday, November 09, 2005

Blathering Idiots

Yeah, Munkees! What's up baby? What's ya know good? Did you figure out the questions to my answers? Oh, you'd be surprised how off you probably are.

Today was brutal as hell. It was a 5 meeting day, back to back, no lunch break. Sitting around, expounding on superficial details, none of which will get any assignments done. I'm pretty sick of talking once my day is done, so I make a bee-line for the gym. Now, this is not an everyday thing. As a matter of fact, this is my first time going to the gym since I arrived here in July.

In this little Shithole I call home, there is no Bally's Total Fitness or anything like that, so the gym is the YMCA. It's a quaint, old school building with a really state of the art weight room. I never expected it to look like this. I was excited when I saw it and couldn't wait to work out. So I'm warming up on the stationary bike and this cat that works there walks up to me. He introduces himself as the director of the Y and begins to talk to me, like what do I do and where am I from. I'm a pretty private nigga. People that know me know that. It was the last thing my ex-wife violated, it caused my walkout. I don't like talking to people about me. I can talk to y'all semi-anonymously. But this guy was in my face.

Another thing about it is that white folks in general believe they are entitled to information like that. "Well I'll just see who this guy is!" Nobody else has gotten stepped to by this guy, so I guess he's gonna find out who this massive dreadlocked muthafucka is in his spot. Once again, I live in a small town. I'm on local TV every two weeks. So I tell him who I am and what I do.

He proceeds to talk to me about everything under the sun, city politics, yesterday's election, my hopes and aspirations. I'm not used to being social nor am I used to a dude being interested in my life. The first thing I think when a man strikes up a conversation with me is "This nigga's gay." That's why most dudes ain't making new male friends that ain't co-workers. Otherwise, what excuse do you have to talk to another nigga?

My point with this post was to illustrate my inability to escape blathering fucking idiots. They are everywhere. At work, at the gym, at the market, at the bar. I gotta find a hobby. And it can't involve opening a broad's legs. I need to get my library card or something. Go someplace niggas can't talk.

Some Off Topic Shit

My condolences go out to Joy Bryant for hitting the egomaniacal trifecta. First, she stars in Antwone Fisher. About a nigga named Antwone Fisher. Written by a nigga named Antwone Fisher. Produced by a nigga named Antwone Fisher. In the movie a nigga named Antwone Fisher is the hero.

Next, my sweet sugah was in a flick called Baaaadaaaassss! It was a movie directed by and starring Mario Van Peebles. It was the first on-screen blow job by a son to his father.

And last but certainly not least, Joy is in Get Rich or Die Tryin'. In this movie a charmless thug named Marcus, played by a charmless thug named Curtis, makes a lot of bad choices. One of those choices was to make a autobiographical movie which could very likely get played in a court of law one day very soon. Fuckin' idiot.

Happy Birthday MsKeKe,


Insaneblackwoman said...

Yo KZ:
Good post. About that Get Rich or Die Trying shit... right, that. Right, that, baby. For real.
"Incrimination". I always figga'd rappers/wannabe actors/wannabe movie producers to be kind of like that most dreaded and feared type of woman that exists in humankind: a bitch that can't be quiet; always rapping about something. I like your logic and your heart.

The_Practitioner said...

Two peas in pod my brotha...two peas in pod. I'm a private dude too. I guard my privacy like an 18 year old guards his ass in a maximum security prison. There are women I've been involved with who still don't know my last name. You never know what a brawd would do with that kinda of blabbin out your whole whole Government name while drunk at the bar.

Didi Roby said...

What's good papi! I have been missing you...sorry I haven't been around..working hard here in the chi! Get at me with those questions okay....You know which ones:)

I'm private...just not in blog land:)

TRUTHZ said...

don't knock him KZ cuz that may mean opportunity for me..esp if the trial don't start until 2007 when i take the bar. that's what's up, this movie can be my ticket to getting rich.

but i feel you on the private thing. my friends thinks it is funny. but here's a trick, when people are talking to you and you aren't feeling them, just look them in the eyes very intensely and then let your eyes glaze over and start blinking non-stop. betcha they won't approach you again.

Chubby Chocolate said...

@Truthz...I've done that before (the glazed staredown), it works!

I'm most private with men.
Most of the ones I've dated,don't know where I live or my last name...But I want to know EVERYTHING about them and will get an attitude if they withhold info.
I'm very private and nosy at the same time...Ain't that some shit?

Knockout Zed said...

You know I luv you, right? Now post those 50 DDs!

When I first got this job, they put an article about me in the newspaper. They put in my background, where I was from, where I attended school and MY SALARY!!! I was fuckin' livid. Gotdamn Freedom Of Information Act.

I missed you sooooo much! The question was "Which blogs do you read first everyday?"

We'll check on that privacy thang! ;-)

My eyes glaze over very easily. I'm usually very confused.

You know the best way to keep my mouth shut? Take a seat! Mmmmmmmmmmfffffffffmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm


~ Eclectic Soul ~ said...

Damn Chubby, we just alike on the private/nosy thing!!! Folks don't know where I live eitha!!! They lucky to know the general vicinity, pshhhhhh...

WIP said...

So, when you sign up to join small town joint - YMCA - do you put down real contact info on your application or bogus? When I swipe my gym card and my info, and freakin "avator-size" photo, pops up on the 'puter screen, I get all paranoid. How's that for privacy? I play the don't-ask-no-questions-secretly-praying-they-won't-probe-in-my-world-role.

Knockout Zed said...

Yo, the job pays for the membership. They got all my info!

Chubby Chocolate said...

YEWWWW, my friend are a true, NUTCASE!!! I spit out my hot chocolate on my monitor, thanks to you...

Didi Roby said...

You are a mess Papi! fo real:)

But I loves ya!