So I'm chillin', right? Last Thursday I'm online, not pervin' out, but actually reading when my phone rings. I don't recognize the number or the area code. Since I'm no longer dodging bill collectors, I answer. It's "Bound and Gagged", this chick I used to "see" in college. I didn't even realize she had my number. I haven't seen her in 12 years, haven't talked to her in at least 5 years. She's talking to me about the lack of quality dilznick she's been receiving lately, out of the blue. She was thinking about me and last time we hooked up. Are you fuckin' kiddin' me? Twelve years? She wants to know when she can come see me. I told her I'm not in Detroit anymore. She says I'm closer to her now. I told her I'd see if I could check her out. "You're still the same bullshit artist you were in school. You ain't coming." I laughed and we got off the phone with each other.
Track 2 - "New Position"
So I'm chillin' right? It's Sunday afternoon, and I'm watching this excrutiating movie that was recommended to me by my favorite WCBH (hint: not that mean ass Tam!!!), when I get a phone call from Dreadlady. "What happened to you Saturday?" "What do you mean?" "You had an appointment with me Saturday." "No I didn't. I have an appointment this coming Saturday, the 19th." "Oooh, I was anticipating seeing you. I guess I was just overly anxious." Where is this coming from? It's been a while since we hooked up. I don't know where this is coming from. A sense of nostalgia, I guess. "I named my new vibrator 'Zeddy'." "That's magnificient", I deadpanned. "I'm in the middle of this movie. I'll see you next Saturday."
Track 10 - "Kiss"
So I'm at work today, right? A few minutes ago. And my celly rings. I don't recognize the number, but I answer anyway. "When are you coming home?" My instincts tell me to lie. "I don't know." Mind you, I don't know who I'm talking to, but I'm not about to ask. Whoever's talking apparently thinks they got it like that. No need to spoil the illusion. "I need to see you. I'm losing my voice. I need that 'honey treatment' we used to try." Bingo. Charlize Theron. "I'm sorry, I don't know when I'll be back in the city. "
Track 10 - "Kiss"
So I'm at work today, right? A few minutes ago. And my celly rings. I don't recognize the number, but I answer anyway. "When are you coming home?" My instincts tell me to lie. "I don't know." Mind you, I don't know who I'm talking to, but I'm not about to ask. Whoever's talking apparently thinks they got it like that. No need to spoil the illusion. "I need to see you. I'm losing my voice. I need that 'honey treatment' we used to try." Bingo. Charlize Theron. "I'm sorry, I don't know when I'll be back in the city. "
Track 11 - "Anotherloverholenyohead"
If I called you as much as I thought about you, you'd fuckin' hate me. I'm trying to occupy the same space you occupy and honestly I don't know how I got caught by surprise like this. I'm trying to understand what I'm feeling. I'm working on it, and it's not easy.
Be,
KZ
49 comments:
DAMN is it true?? I'm first???
What is really going on?
You got all this ass coming yo way, but you just won't go after it?
Why you call Tam mean?...*lol*
Track 11?
You really are Mr. Friggin Popularity, aren't you? Doesn't seem to faze you one bit though. Waiting for the quality?
I'm taken.
oooooohhhhh Tam's gonna get you.
hmmm...... Yeah. Tam's gonna bite you straight in the ass!! LOL
Anyway... since I wasn't first I have no other commentary...
carry on.....
@Nsane
This might be the first time you've been first EVER!!!
I can't call it. I have absolutely no desire to chase pussy. No desire to follow through. It's crazy.
Tam is mean!!! She calls me a "bitch" almost daily! That's not right!
@RD
Track 11.
@Chele
It's quality, it's just not what I want right now.
Are you taken? Did you say yes? It's not official until the ceremony. Until then, you're free as far as I'm concerned.
@Robyn
Endorphins, baby. You know the drill.
KZ
ummmm do I know her?
@RD
You might, you might.
KZ
Hmmm. Track Number three is "I Wonder U" and I am wondering about your respoonse to Track Number 11.
You sound smitten Mr. Zed.
okay now all of this hair business makes me uncomfortable. it seems like baby girl might be trying to put the special sauce into your loc oil...work on that!
Gagged and Tied? What's her name again?
So now bondage and domination have come up two days in a row
anotherloverholeinyourhead
whatchu know about Prince?!
OK I confess, Track #11 is about me. Zed I thought that we were gonna wait until the next blog event to tell everybody???
@1969
Smitten? Nah. More like perplexed. I don't know what's happened to me. I feel like a pure sucka.
@Miss Ahmad
She's my hair lady. What can I do? I can stay here and get my locs tightened by the "hair pimp".
Her name is "Bound and Gagged". People like what they like. It's not my cup of tea, but I'll indulge.
I'm an Prince encyclopedia. Ask me anything.
@OneFrom
Shhhh! Discretion, baby, discretion!!!
KZ
And you claim to be a Prince afficionado? WOW. Your stock is rising.
Sucker Punched huh? In an "OUCH" kind of way or in a "Hmmm, I think I like it" way.
This is great! Give one of these blasts from the past a chance you never know or just "save" yourself for that dream woman.
@1969
People question my Prince credentials because I've only seen Purple Rain 3 times and Under The Cherry Moon over 300 times. But I know Prince. Trust me.
I'm off my square, 69. I cain't call it. I don't know if it's good or bad.
KZ
I did not say yes.
I am not free.
But I am reasonable.
What album was "International Lover" first recorded on and in what year?
@Honest
I can't save myself for this woman. I'm pretty certain this thing is one sided. Or at the most heavily tilted in her favor.
KZ
@Chele
I'm listening to "1999" in my car right now. That was too easy. The year was 1982, his first two year break between albums. The next album Purple Rain came out in 1984.
Reasonable is sexy. Free is irresistable.
KZ
how you do know how she feels?
do you assume that she feels like you do when you get calls from darksided women who want to steal your sperm? If so, you might be projecting...
just a thought.
by the way, you've inspired me to pull out some vintage Prince Hits
Right now I'm listening to Uptown.
Give you a kiss if you can name that album!
Now u update.......
"Bound and Gagged". You crack me up!
I wasn't trying to stump you, Daddy. I heard the song on the radio yesterday and I wanted to pick up a copy. It's always been one of my favorites.
LOL she calls u bitch...Thats too DAMN FUNNY!!!!
This is the second time I was first..the last time I said early bird catches the worm!!
sounds like you got it bad son! and i love the 'under the cherry moon" references. you know we are >here< when it comes to prince. you still need to up your "purple rain" quota though.
i know you know, but name some prince songs recorded without a bass line. i just had to ask :)
What do you think is his best album?
I am a Sign of the Times fan myself.
And what do you think is his best slow jam....???This will say a lot about you Zed.
Knocked off your square? Just take it slow and be patient. Feel the situation out. I am rooting for you.
PS. I like when you call me '69...LOL
Tam's not mean! She's just misunderstood...Bitch is a love term...you should be honored she does not call you something else.
WOW...you sound like you trying to put an exclusive contract together over there. Not taking offers for lucrative deals...interesting.
damn, can I get in on the Prince commentary?
Parade is a hot album. Sometimes it Snows in April is my favorite cut on there.
My favorite Prince cuts, although its nearly impossible to pick are The Beautiful Ones, Pink Cashmere, and Nothing Compares 2U (the live version)
Seen him in concert 3 times and he never disappoints.
hmmmm....could it be that you really are getting sentimental zeddy ruxpin? could you possibly be "hearing" what these women are saying, instead of simply listening? and the fact that you weren't all brash and mean could also mean, that you are softening up...?
Simply riveting.
..."everytime I comb my hair, thoughts of you get in my eyes. your a sinner I don't care, I just want your creamy thighs"...
Guess that applies to someone else now......*sigh*
but....
Simply riveting.
@Miss Ahmad
I might be projecting somewhat...
Uptown is the shit. Head is better. It's the Dirty Mind album. Where's my kiss?
@Ill Nana
What does this mean? Help me out.
@Monica
Ol' B and G was famous for her peculiarities.
@Chele
This might just be my suspicious ass, but the more I listen to "Int'l Lover" it sounds like Prince is the fuckee not the fucker.
@Nsane
Everytime she's first on a post, Tam says "First Bitches!" and I take that shit personally.
I remember the "early bird" shit. I forgot to talk nasty to you!
@Aqua
"4 The Tears In Your Eyes"? "Lonely Christmas"?
@1969
I honestly think "Around The World In A Day" is the most underrated work in the world. "Condition of the Heart" is amazing. "Controversy" (the album) is pretty amazing too. "Let's Work" is a beast. Sign O' The Times came out my senior year in high school, so it always has a special place in my heart. I got a hand job on prom night to "Slow Love". LOL!!!
And that '69 thing. You're trying to get my ass beat down, ain't ya?
@T Cas
All those pics are hot! I personally really love "Joy In Repetition".
Surprisingly I never saw Prince in concert.
@FA
I'm a fuckin' dickhead who couldn't just say "I'm not feeling you anymore". People pleasing bastard that I am couldn't disappoint them overtly.
@Blah
I haven't combed my hair in over 4 years, but I feel ya. I used to live in a two story walk up in Erotic City. It once rained for 17 Days when I was there.
KZ
smooches!!
hey, what about 'when doves cry' and 'kiss'? you forgot about those?
and i love 'temptation' from 'around the world
Well MY Prince joints are
Adore, Darlin' Nikki and Insatiable...
(the loooong version) hahahaha!
Who is this track 11?
What is this all about? Are you cheatin' on me??!
the songs are
controversy
annie christian
when you were mine
the ballad of dorothy parker
strange relationship
God
Jack U Off
and Uptown...
just to start with, can't even get into the baby making music!
oh yea, considering all the drama in your life, you should see if she's available to do your hair:-)
"Adore"...I know it is one of the more popular cuts but it is still, in my opinion, one of the tightest cuts of all time!!! Yeah I have to go with "Adore"...
@Miss Ahmad
I need tongue!
@Aqua
Temptation is my shit!!! Absolutely dope! Kiss and When Doves Cry, while both live songs, don't move me like a lot of the less popular stuff.
@SD
Darling Nikki? Oooh! I wish I'd known that when I saw you. Bad girl!
Don't worry about Track 11. It doesn't affect us!
@Miss Ahmad
All those songs are the SHIT! Annie Christian and The Ballad of Dorothy Parker are my favorites from that list. Jack U Off, hunh?
I don't know if Track 11 can help me out. I mean, she'd have to be near me, right?
KZ
@RD
Woman, if you were in close proximity to me and Adore came on, it would be trouble. Anywhere...well, maybe not the ride...
KZ
I agree RD...Adore is one of the most beautiful songs ever written. The words....I mean, Prince ain't f*ckin just for kicks.
Insatiable (the long version played on many a college slow jam tape) is NO JOKE. Neither is Scandalous. DAMN.
I love the Ballad of Dorothy Parket, If I was your girlfriend, I wanna be your lover, Nothing Compares 2 You, Annie Christian, Forever, and I think the Beautiful Ones is Prince at his BEST. Do you want him....or do you want me.....cause I want YOU.
Now Zed, you started all of us on the Prince tangent but we still need to know about Track Number 11.
@69
Y'all started on this Prince thing. That's just the vehicle I used to tell my story. Prince was soooo secondary in this thing.
Track 11 is Track 11, nothing more. I got this uneasy, joyous, melancholy, nervous feeling. I'm used to planning things out and right now I'm clueless to what comes next.
KZ
this just shows you...prince is the TRUTH!
i can't pick my favorite song because i love them all.
>proud member of the NPG music club<
excrutiating movie huh?
tell us more!
I'm confused...But my favorite Prince songs are:
Dorothy Parker
The Beautiful Ones
Pink Cashmere
Adore
How Come You Don't Call Me Anymore (Alicia Keys butchered that song)
@Aqua
Certain songs correlate with different periods in my life, so it's hard for me to make a hard and fast decision on favorites. He is the man!
@Miss Ahmad
I might fall asleep telling you about this excrutiating movie. I think this may have been penance for something I did wrong.
I'm telling everyone to be careful if a WCBH recommends a movie to you!!!
@CC
I've used this construct to liken myself to Christopher Tracy, the gigolo from UTCM, and using the songs to illustrate the situation. In the end, he finds true love but it's not a happy ending. That's where this Prince thing came in.
Alicia Keys did fuck that song up.
@Mariposa
You got jacked for your heart? Did Common drop by?
KZ
@CG
Well, she did e-mail me a pic. So I know, I know.
KZ
You can call me, Zed, I won't bite ya head off *giggles*
Prince...whew lawd. Started my week off right lovely! I am STILL smiling, and it's Wednesday :)
On with the show now...
Hey...you called me MEAN...
See? That's why I call you BITCH! But you're still my favorite BIATCH! *muah*
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