Saturday, October 22, 2005

Non-Prophet

Say niggas, how's the weekend going? I almost took my ass to a cybercafe to post, but instead I brought my ass home. I was preparing to go to homecoming this weekend and Batshit (ya girl) was basically badgering me the whole time. She was irritated I was leaving the Anus for another weeked. We'd been getting on each others nerves for a little while now. Arguments galore. We'd had disagreements since we met, we've only been having arguments this week.

I left. I was making my way on the short trip to MSU and she called me as I was looking for the freeway exit. I was talking to her and the exit came up quick. As I tried to change lanes, I almost got hit by another car speeding up behind me. I yelled "Shit!" as I swerved, missed the other car and exited the freeway. She says to me "Why do you have to cuss?" I said "I sorry I offended you but I was almost killed. It was my initial reaction." She says "You don't respect me." "Please, let's just get off the phone." "No, tell me why you'd cuss like that when I'm on the phone?"

I lost it at that point. Honestly I can't believe I didn't lose it before then. I have a pretty quick temper anyway. "Are you fucking insane? Hunh? How the fuck can you turn me almost getting killed trying to talk to you into some sort of victimization? Is it always about you? You must be out yo' fuckin' mind." Batshit responds "Look you are taking this way out of proportion. You need to calm down." Now, I know I need to calm down, but the last thing an upset nigga wants to hear is "calm down". She asks "Why are you always so angry?" I hung up.

I got to my hotel, checked in, and got to my room. I sat down for a minute and my celly rang. Batshit starts "I'm sorry if I said anything to offend you..." I interrupted "I almost got killed and you made it about you. If you wanted to have a fight about how much I respect you, you picked the battle at the wrong time." She says "I'll let you go."

That incident colored my whole weekend. The little Greek basketball tourney, the party, the tailgating. It all sucked because I was mad the whole time. I couldn't enjoy myself. The topper was seeing Jayne Kennedy. I was talking to my boy Three and he saw one of his friends. They were talking and JK walked up and hugged me. "Hey Zed!" "What's up, Jayne." Three's boy turned and said "Hey Three, this is my woman, JK." And I was introduced to her man.

Well, there you have it. My weekend in a nutshell. I didn't even stay Saturday night. I came back home. It fell far below my expectations, but sometimes you just can't predict these things.

Keep Doing Whatcha Do,
KZ

12 comments:

Melle Mel said...

I'm sorry to hear that your weekend was not filled with fun and wild sexed stories. Furthermore, I am thoroughly saddened that Batshit had something to do with it...

Whatca gone do now Zed?

Chubby Chocolate said...

BATSHIT?!...BATSHIT?!

I'm speechles.

~ Eclectic Soul ~ said...

SMMFH... Batshit??? Ummmmhhh... she musta buried ya draws in her back yard or else you just a glutton for punishment, as the old folks say.

sj-the-infamous said...

I'm saying...why is Batshit still even in the vocab?

I'm expecting more sin & debauchery in the posts to come....get ta fuckin LOLOLOL

twin said...

jk is a spartan

Blah Blah Blah said...

You let a chick spoil your weekend of debauchery?????
Hmmm, methinks that still waters run deep where Batshit is concerned.

I had a weak ass weekend too. At least you got outta twon though.
Promise me this coming wekend will be better....:-)

toneec42 said...

Okay, now tell us what's really going on in your head about Batshit? Why is that woman still around, Zed?
It sounds like your weekend went about as well as mine. Don't you hate it when you get excited about something and it fizzles?

Knockout Zed said...

@ All y'all
There is no special connection between me and Batshit. Trust me. She is here and she's having sex with me. That's the connection. Wall shaking, window shattering sex. I thought JK was the replacement, but now I just gotta look harder.

@twin
Yes, JK is a Spartan. And her man, too. He's definitely a "type" not a nigga that swept her off her feet. She likes a "type" and he's that "type". She'll break up with him and hook up with another "type". Nuthin' special about that.

Insaneblackwoman said...

Zed:
You should have came on home and acted a munkee!

Butterfly Jones said...

Batshit musta made you some panty soup. Surely the coochie ain't worth all that Mary J drama?

Knockout Zed said...

If Batshit's pussy was a scientist, it would have invented the Polio vaccine.

KZ

Anonymous said...

That was a funny argument...If I might ask, who and what is a Batshit?